Saturday, March 29, 2008

Went to BED to See Adam Freeland for WMC

I wish I was still there. Between the bed, the energy, the pink Moet, the strawberries and the insanely good music, it was a TIME! I'm still recovering!

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Sam's Birthday Boat Trip Part One of I don't know how many yet

A couple of days before her birthday, my bff Samstyl called me in a complete state of panic.

She looks super upset to my right, right? Let's not get ahead of ourselves

Anyway, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted by myself ( see mom I do it to everyone!) Samstyl was freaking out about the birthday surprise boyfriend Seth was planning for her.
"All I know is that I have to bring a bathingsuit and wake up really early on a Saturday morning," she said. "Wearing a bathingsuit and being up at the crack of dawn's ass on a Saturday are my two least favorite things in the world."

Without giving it all away, as Seth and I had been planning this for weeks, I had to at least tell her she didn't have to go swimming if she didn't want to. This later will prove to be false as even though I have no great desire to swim around in ice cold water on a cloudy day with various sea creatures, my bladder had a great need to be emptied. And, can't imagine why, no one wanted me to pee right off the back of the ladder I had to climb down to get in.....

Wait, is this post about Sam's B-Day or my bladder.....

Anyway, we arrived at the at the marina across from the Eden Rock on Collins in Mid beach at 840 AM, 20 minutes early. We lugged champagne, strawberries, Einstein's bagels and cream cheese, water, beer, fruit salad, cake, towels, and accoutrements. down to the dock, where we we were met by the captain of a glorified dinghy. Richy started waxing poetic about all the Cigarette's we could have borrowed (YEAH right, I know Skippy better !) And the crowd grew visibly nervous as we waited for Jackie and Junior AKA Doody.
Seth tried, hastily to get a free upgrade. It was time to pile into the one engine shell of a 14 foot hull. The sun wasn't out, the air was a bit nipply, but we were rocking and rolling, sure our captain was going to let us smoke on the thing
I attempted to make Mimosas with plastic champagne goldblets, but as I made them juice, then strawberry, then champagne, the strawberry acted at a seal, keeping the grove-fresh OJ and the champagne separate... But I wouldn't notice that yet.

Pretty soon we were in open water, cruising past Key Biscayne, and even this non boat owning boat snob had to agree. This little POS had some Cajones!

The Veuve Cliquot was flowing, leading me and subsequently Sam and Jackie into a rousing round of "Champagne on a little boat" When Sam spilled champagne on herself and declared it was raining, we all looked the other way. "It's Champagning!" I said. However, when she spilled onto the outboard engine and turned around with a straight face on and told it " I'm sorry" before turning back around to finish her story, we decided to give drinking a break for a few hours...

Stay tuned.... Or whatever that is in laptop land - logged on



Am so excited, Richy and I are going to B.E.D. tonight to see Adam Freeland...HAHA I'm a hyperlinking fool!

Angry Miamians Against SoBe Drivers (AMASD)

If I only had one of these... Well, that's a whole other story....

After living on 8th and Michigan for a few years, before packing it in and moving to the shores, I perfected a technique that can only be pulled off by the bold and/ or stupidly fearless.

It’s not your turn to walk, in fact, the light up hand is glaring at you but you’re hungry, damn it, and Wild Oats is only two blocks away… cars are coming left and right and you see up ahead there’s a small break in traffic, enough to get across if you run or the oncoming car just slightly slows down.

Here’s what you do -


Throw your shoulders back, chest out , head high, and strut across that street while looking directly at the human being inside that flying (flying at your face right now but it’s ok, you’ve almost made it) hunk of fiberglass and metal..."I dare you to hit me” you will say with your eyes. Trust me, they will slow down. I’m living proof..

WARNING: This activity is not recommended for walking with children or animals, adults over the age of sixty- five, the inebriated, anyone over 300 pounds, and straight white men.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

OYE MI POEMA!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was Born in Sedona

Everyone says otherwise. They drive me

Past a hospital in downtown Hartford

And say, up there, fourth floor. I say,

No, in a small artist co-op overlooking

Boynton Canyon Rock. No doctor, no drugs.

Just us and a midwife who knew

The Celestine Prophecy by heart.

They show me a certificate that says, baby girl, 4:17 pm, Mt. Sinai Hospital

And all the rest of the clich├ęs I could have lived by.

All that first night my mother was my cradle

as I looked out at the acres of red

Rock, absorbing the Arizona sun which

Turned liquid red then dark orange into blue, cacti in the

Distance slowly enveloped by a cloak of navy, laying quietly

In the arms of a woman who hitchhiked cross

country to give birth

Because she was answering the call.

All night they meditated and prayed

My mother telling me names of

Crystals that sounded as strong and fierce as the women

Who wore them; Amazonite, Citrine, Adventurine.

One began to paint my portrait

in oils, a painting I have never

Seen but love, the way you cannot see your

Organs but you know that they are there. All around

Pottery wheels hummed, feet kept the rhythm, and the air smelled of burning white

Sage and amber. That morning she faced us both east

toward a wall of windows, where the sun was

Rising steadily behind miles of deep red rock, gently shaking me

Until my eyes opened into the awakening landscape

of a new day.

You wonder why I am impossible

To tame.

And talk about things like spirit guides

And insisted on driving to Sedona alone, from Phoenix

To hike four miles in the rapidly cooling dusk to sit

At a vortex site and meditate, holding a heart carved

Of snowflake obsidian.

Why I burn sage to clean the house

And refuse to shower every day,

No matter who complains. Look into my eyes!

They were born gazing into the endless expanse of the Arizona desert,

Red mountains full of vortices where concentrated eternal energy

Can help you answer your own questions

The rising sun changing the sky over those mountains, while that shock

Was immortalized by an artist whose

Name I never learned.

I told you before. I was born in Sedona.

Table 8, Worth the Wait Parts 1 & 2

Part One

One of my favorite tips from my favorite foodie, Rachael Ray, is to do new/pricey restaurants for lunch, it’s a much more affordable way to try a place. My bff SamStyl and I have lunch out together at least once a week. Our favorite haunts are Joe Allens, Macaluso’s ( I call her and say let’s do Macaluncho’s), and Michaels. If we’re not in the mood to spend 20$/ person, we do Secret Sandwich or grab pizza at Steve’s. Last Friday we were feeling fabulous, and were on our way to the Front Porch when I spotted Table 8. It looked fabulous, and so we decided to go in. It was 2pm on a friday afternoon. We were seated in woven leather chairs with thick cushions and handed thick, leather menu’s. For some reason, it took about 20 minutes to get my pelligrino and Sam’s iced tea and place our order. That was the most annoying part of our lunch but it gave us a chance to figure out our best plan of attack for this new menu. We finally decided to split the turkey club and the short rib grilled cheese. Although it took another twenty minutes for it to arrive, we had a delicious kalamata olive, fresh herb and fruity olive oil tapenade to eat with toasted bagel chips and onion pockets. When the food finally arrived, it was definitely worth the wait - best turkey club EVER, people!

Part Two

Okay, the turkey club had oven roasted turkey cut to the perfect thickness and piled on thick toasted white peasant bread, slices of the freshest avocado I have ever had, boston bibb lettuce, marinated plum tomatoes, thick slices of applewood smoked bacon, and an amazing fresh herb and dijon mustard mayo that tasted a bit like bearnaise and also a little bit like heaven. It was served with a frisee salad I basically ignored and white truffle oil homemade potato chips. Honestly, SamStyl and I could have split the sandwich, which was 12$, and been totally full. But then we would have missed out on the french fries and the short rib grilled cheese ($15). Thick toasted buttery bread,red onion marmalade, melted bel paese cheese with shreds of deliciously braised short ribs mixed in, and the best french fries I have had in recent memory. The bill, including 18% gratuity, was 46.25, but I also ordered a large bottle of pelligrino for myself. We probably could have ordered just the club, with the french fries and had tap water and been out of there for under 20$. Add to that the beautiful boys walking by, all in town for White party weekend, and it really was the perfect SoBe lunch

Table 8 South Beach
1458 Ocean Dr, Miami Beach, FL 33139
(305) 695-4114

Located in the Regent Hotel