Friday, July 18, 2008

NEWS ALERT! Britney does actually have half a brain

Ms. Shameless gave over full custody of her two children to the lesser of two evils. I expect a big drug and alcohol induced, chotcke baring rebellion coming on.... Come to think of it, last night I saw a thing on E about Courtney Love and minus the dead heroin addict husband, I see her and imagine that will be Brit Brit in a few years....Britney is one of my favorite trainwrecks to watch. Somewhere in the galaxy there is a video of me in full school girl get up singing my weird song version of "Lucky" -"She's so easy, she's a bike and they ride ride ride her through the night..."
Will post the entire song next weird song wednesday

Thursday, July 17, 2008


I hate how we artists, so different from the majority, so insecure and yet sure of our own genius, feel the need for disclaimers before presenting a piece of their work.

Backstories however, those are sometimes necessary. This is the first poem I ever published, which somehow came into my head nearly complete, a rare and magical gift for any artist, especially one whose medium is words. It is also the first poem I ever published, my junior year at UConn in the notoriously hard to get into Long River Review. I didn't appreciate the value of this until I worked on the review senior year and watched thousands of poems dismissed, picked apart, and thrown aside until only 39 remained. It is still a bit hard for me to fathom why a couple of poets got more than one spot. Then I was angry, now I just wonder who they were blowing or how much less partying they were doing than me. When I got the letter this poem was published, it was the best feeling I have ever had.. And then of course my delusions of grandeur had me dreaming I was the next Allen Ginsberg, put on this earth to bring poetry away from it's ivory tower of acadamia and back to the masses. But then I remembered. The masses are unable to understand poetry, and that I have never been a fan of the masses. Then my lofty ego decided to submit work to the most exclusive of journals, The Paris Review, etc, got a few rejection letters and buried my head in shame. I need to put myself back out there.
So I'm planning on reading this at the Bohemia Room's Cunnilinguistics night July 23 at Santo on Lincoln Road...Hope I don't talk myself out of it. I find the more I embarass myself and my loved ones, the better my work is... It's scary when the best stories are the ones that might make your family disown you... I'm starting to realize I'll forgive myself much easier for that than for not putting out the work I was put here to do. I'm rusty now, but I can get back to where I was... Someone once said there's nothing worse than wasted talent.... and I'm not getting any younger...

Whew! You still with me?

Here goes, brutally honest 19 year old me:

Naughty Nudie

Walking into high schools
blurred orange morning
I glance down
surprised and ashamed
at my own bare breasts

I have never had that dream

I was born naked
a baby playing in summer sun
shrinking and shrieking
from the confines
of bathing suits and sunscreen

I was the little girl
who told all the neighbors
what happened when
you pulled her Daddy's finger

Who forgot to wear underwear
to a cousins Bar Mitzvah
announcing it as
we pulled into temple
a place where even the hair on my head
should not be naked
my parents laughed at my inanity
the next few hours
I enjoyed the breeze

Naked has been my way
in every sense

On a tipsy adolescent night
two boys dared me
to run naked
from pond to pool
and back

At private school on Monday
I was the slut.

Reputation fails to erase the memory
of the feeling
night wind and bare skin
unencumbered movement
the thud of my entire body
and nothing more
as it met with the earth.

In a summer sundress it is easy
to be naked
even as I sit here now
I am still naked.

Some may wear cloaks
and masks
makeup and jewelry
to show the world
who they think it thinks
they should be.
That's fine with me.

I'll be naked.

Naughty Nudie

Shear Genius- I'm Lovin' It

I have recently added a new show to my rediculous tv repetoire. See new list in sidebar of how many shows I watch... Tk god for DVR and Itunes TV! Sheer Genius is hysterical, especially due to Charlie and Daniel. I just love them! Charlie's best quote in the last episode, regarding Nekisa, was, "Sorry Honey, big titties can't get you out of everything." LOL that's a lesson I learned the hard way.....I really hope Charlie makes it really far because I heart watching him.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Anatomy of My Hair Extensions

My amazingly talented friend/stylist extraordinaire Danny Dillon, proprietor of Shampology Salon and all around awesome guy hand cut, dyed, and sewed onto clips the most beautiful locks of hair I have ever seen. The extensions were his brainchild, bridging the gap between super expensive leave in for three month extensions and cheap fake hair clips. His prices are about 1/4 of the price of three month leave in extensions and I've had mine for about 7 months now and haven't even had to wash them yet! Even though I've been growing my hair out the last few months, if he clips the bottom layer super low, it still gives me an extra 2.5 inches and sexy Serena from Gossip Girl volume. This time when I went in to have them put in professionally ( something I dare not attempt on my own because of my Jewish two left handedness, but probably most of you could figure it out.) Danny blew out my now super long hair glass flat first so we could take before and after shots...Shampology is planning a grand fete next month, invite only, so if and only if any of you are in the market for the best hairstylist ever, email

Shampology Salon & Supply Inc.
180 ne 39th St. Suite 216
Miami Fl 33137

Quote of the Day

I see and I remember
I hear and I forget
I do and I understand

-Old Proverb

Concoction of the day - Chicken Cutlets!

So many different versions of cutlets... We have Cuban Breaded Chicken, German Schnitzel, Southern Fried Chicken..This is my version, which is a version within a version of Italian Chicken Cutlets.

Shopping list

One package (1.5) or skinless boneless chicken breasts
Red pepper flakes
Fresh Italian Parsley
2 eggs
Italian seasoned bread crumbs
Parmigiano Reggiano
Locatelli Romano
light olive oil
meat mallet
freezer bags
freshground pepper
sea salt


Rinse the chicken and pat drycut off fatty, yucky parts
dry with paper towel, place one at a time in freezer bag and pound with glancing blows until 1/2-1/4 inch thick, then cut into smaller pieces. Scramble eggs with a splash of milk. Preheat large skillet with a healthy layer of light olive oil to medium. chop parsley. Place in bowl. Pour generous amount of breadcrumbs in, adding a half cup each of parm and romano. Grind plenty of pepper in and add a pinch of red pepper flakes. Add a small amount of salt. Dip chicken in eggs, then breadcrumbs, then place in skillet. Brown on each side, at least five minutes. As each cutlet becomes ready, drain on paper towel covered plate. Cut lemon and squeeze onto cutlets just before serving.

Weird Song Wednesday

This is an oldie but goodie I wrote in college, to Robert Palmer's "Addicted to Love"

"Addicted to Drugs"

You smoked a bong
but you're not stoned
this pot
must be homegrown
Your in a mood
your hands shake
a glass of wine
is what it takes

You can't sleep ( whoaaa)
You can't eat
No doubt
you're on E
you're gonna try
some OC
another high
is all you need

Whooooaa you like to think that you're immune to this stuff
(Oh Yeah)

Closer to the truth to say you, can't get enough and well you might as well face it you're addicted to drugs

You're cutting lines
of coke I see
you're wigging out
here try some speed
Your heart beats
quadruple time
Ignore it and do one more line

One last line...
You can't be saved
all you crave

The crack pipe
is packed for you
And you'd have a chance
if you knew...

Whoooaa you like to think that you're immune to this stuff

(Oh Yeah!)

Closer to the truth to say you, can't get enough and well you might as well face it you're addicted to drugs
Might as well face it you're addicted to drugs
Might as well face it you're addicted to drugs
Might as well face it you're addicted to drugs