Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Weird Song Wednesday from the vault in my mind

I performed this song in the days when Britney and I looked more alike ( I was blonde, she wasn't fat) on a video that belongs to people I am no longer friends with.. who enjoy showing it to whoever they feel like.... How do I know this? I have been recognized more than once by random, random people in CT as that girl... You know, the one who dressed up in full Britney style get up - knee high boots, a corset, and a really short black skirt,(and yes, underwear) dramatically pulled a tapestry across a curtain rod and jumped down from a lofted bed to sing a song she wrote to the tune of Lucky about all the whorebags at UConn.... At least I used to think they were.... Compared to the men and women of Miami, they were frigid prudes.... End of disclaimer...

"Easy" to the tune of Lucky by Britney Spears

Early morning
she wakes up
with a kick, kick, kick out the door....
Last night's make-up.... wine stained smile
it's not to hard to be a whore ( baby)

Isn't she slutty, this typical girl???

And they say, she's so easy, she's a bike,
and they ride, ride, ride her through the nite
thinking, why the fuck does, this happen to me?
I don't want any... STDs

Lost in Alumni, just 18
and she feels like she's gonna throw up
and his hair is thinning but she keeps on sinning
So tell me, where did she wake up?

Isn't she loose as the Holland tunnel
and they say, she's so easy, the town bike
and they ride, ride, ride her through the nite
thinking, it is hurting, every time I pee
Oh crap I have an STD

Test results: and the winner is, Chlamydia!
I'm Joe Husky standing behind her at the school pharmacy
waiting to spread word of her affliction...

Oh my god, stock up on condoms!

Isn't she slutty, this cow-town bred girl?
She is so easy, and maybe she's Bi
If there's nothing, missing in her life
why does she fuck everyone in sight?

And they say, she's so easy, she's a bike
and they ride, ride ride her through the night
Thinking, I hope no one knows I had an STD
I still haven't finished the b-ball team.....