Top Ten Reasons Why Having Your Own Pool Is Better Than Going To South Beach!

10. It's the Miami equivelent of being the house on the block with the huge hill aftter a snowstorm
9. The Chairs are free
8. The drinks are cheap
7. Dogs and inebriation are encouraged
6. There are no anorexic models on the next chair to make you feel bad about yourself
5. There are no jellyfish, stinging salt water, hidden sharp things, crabs, or sharks to make you feel bad about Everything
4. You can have sex and not get sand in your chotchke
3. You can have sex and the only person who might catch you is the lawn guy, and he's certainly not arresting anyone
2. You already have a parking space, and the walk isn't bad.
1. Two Words : Skinny Dipping!!