Angry Miamians Against SoBe Drivers (AMASD)

If I only had one of these... Well, that's a whole other story....

After living on 8th and Michigan for a few years, before packing it in and moving to the shores, I perfected a technique that can only be pulled off by the bold and/ or stupidly fearless.

It’s not your turn to walk, in fact, the light up hand is glaring at you but you’re hungry, damn it, and Wild Oats is only two blocks away… cars are coming left and right and you see up ahead there’s a small break in traffic, enough to get across if you run or the oncoming car just slightly slows down.

Here’s what you do -

DON’T RUN!

Throw your shoulders back, chest out , head high, and strut across that street while looking directly at the human being inside that flying (flying at your face right now but it’s ok, you’ve almost made it) hunk of fiberglass and metal..."I dare you to hit me” you will say with your eyes. Trust me, they will slow down. I’m living proof..

WARNING: This activity is not recommended for walking with children or animals, adults over the age of sixty- five, the inebriated, anyone over 300 pounds, and straight white men.